Kerri-Lyn Cuppage
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At the Blink of an Eye

7/19/2012

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One year ago today my baby girl was 7 weeks old. We had a fabulous photographer (http://www.devonpetersphotography.com)  coming to take her "newborn" photos  in the afternoon and life was good. We  were tired but so very happy to have our little girl in our lives. For the first  time she slept for 8 full hours through the night and I remember how thrilled I  was to get some good solid sleep!

I fed her her morning bottle and almost immediately she vomited the entire bottle back up and then was hungry again so I  fed her some more which she kept down. She then went back to sleep and slept a  few hours until her Daddy got home for our afternoon photo shoot. Little did I  know what lay in store for us in the next couple of days.

Our precious  little peanut was placid and sleepy and we got some really great shots of her curled up in baskets, snuggled in a sling and my all time favourite, stretched out on Daddy's arm. Exhausted from her afternoon of fame she ate and slept well again in the afternoon.

I has just finished making dinner and Steve fed Jaidyn a bottle and once again she vomited the entire contents back up. It was this time that we noticed her breathing seemed a little "off" to us. We counted and timed her breaths which seemed normal and then I proceeded to call Telehealth to seek some expert advice. After running through the symptoms and Jaidyn's behaviour with us the nurse suggested we go to emerg, and her words were "sooner than later". With dinner left on the counter and rushed attempt at packing the diaper bag we headed out to the hospital in Orangeville.

We arrived and Jaidyn was assessed by the triage nurse and when we took her
clothes  off to weigh her the nurse noticed a deep indraw under Jaidyn's rib cage when  she was taking a breath in and it sparked enough concern that they decided to  admit her. We spent the night with Jaidyn in her room as she received oxygen  from a machine whose alarm sounded all night and drove us a little loopy. lol.  The next day the pediatrician arrived in the morning to  assess the situation and  started running various tests to see what was causing  the laboured breathing.  Chest Xray, upper GI Xray, blood tests, all were clear. It was a bit of a  mystery but Jaidyn otherwise seemed fine. She was eating and  she didn't have a  fever, her saturation levels were good, her only symptom was  some listlessness  and the deep indraw under her rib cage. The investigation and treatments at this  point were pretty calm and relaxed and everyone was pretty calm and relaxed,  although perplexed lol.

Dr. Murphy decided we would try a Ventolin  treatment through a mask in case there was some constriction in her airway,  hopefully this would open things up. Her first treatment went well but her condition didn't change. During the second Ventolin treatment things took an  entirely different turn and it was the beginning of a nightmare that had us  heartbroken and helpless in the hallways of Orangeville Hospital.

I sat  snuggling my precious little monkey with an IV in her scalp in her hospital room  administering the Ventolin treatment prescribed by the doctor and as she lay in  my arms the monitor that she was hooked up to measuring her oxygen levels and  heartrate suddenly alarmed. I looked to the machine which had been alarming  falsely all night and her oxygen levels took a dive and her heartrate plummeted.  I yelled for Steve to hit the nurses button and get a nurse right away. Dr.  Murphy was out in the hallway and him and a team of nurses rushed in, got Jaidyn  on the bed and at this time the panic and urgency of the situation set in. We  left the room and sat outside watching people rush to and from her room for what  seemed like hours. Dr. Murphy rushed in and out and for the first time he  wouldn't make eye contact with us, he wasn't his usual calm and placid nature,  he was worried. After what seemed like an eternity Dr. Murphy came out to us and  said "you have a very sick baby". Although he still didn't know what was wrong,  he had consulted with Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto and had arranged for an  emergency transport team to come and get our sweet little angel to try and  figure out what was wrong. 

When we walked back into Jaidyn's room our  hearts sank as we saw her with a tube down her throat lying there helpless. She  was a feisty little thing even at that age as she continuously tried to pull at  her breathing tube. We stroked her and snuggled her and waited for the transport  team to arrive. 

Here we thought things couldn't get any worse at this  point. Just before the team from Sick Kids arrived Dr. Murphy noticed the  monitor was picking up a rapid heart rate. He immediately listened with his  stethoscope and then sent a nurse for some ice. He placed a baggy of ice on  Jaidyn's tiny little head and once again, it seemed things were getting suddenly  more critical. The team from Sick Kids arrived and when they walked in Dr.  Murphy immediately explained that there was a bigger issue that needed to be  dealt with because Jaidyn was in Tachycardia. They hooked up additional monitors  to her and we watched in horror as the doctor took the baggy of ice and smashed  it into our precious little babies face while saying to us (this isn't going to  be pleasant but it is necessary). We couldn't watch any more and we quickly left  the room and sat outside her door once again listening to urgent phone calls and  watching nurses rush in and out of her room getting meds and running tests. The  entire situation felt surreal. Why was this happening to our baby girl? I made  pleas to my daddy, her guardian angel, to take care of her and keep her safe.  Our hearts sank as we heard them call "all clear" several times and we knew that  they were defibrillating our tiny little peanut. Once they had her stabilised  and ready for transport we were able to go in and see her. 

Our tiny,  precious little baby who we fought so hard to bring into this world, lay there  lifeless in an isolette, hooked up to more machines than I could count with a  breathing tube, iv's and an empty stare. We kissed her and said we'll see you  soon (no goodbyes) and watched them wheel her away from us to the awaiting  ambulance to be rushed to the greatest hospital on earth. 

At the blink  of an eye our lives were changed. We were living a parents worst nightmare with  a critically ill baby and no answers in sight. We were numb and terrified and  thanks to the Mario Andretti driving skills of my sister, arrived downtown  Toronto in record time, actually beating the ambulance there. We were panicked  to know how Jaidyn was doing after being away from her for an hour and  thankfully we bumped into the transport paramedics in the hallway who informed  us that Jaidyn was still stable and she had no further episodes during the drive  down.

The next few hours while we waited in the waiting room to see our  sick little girl seemed to take a lifetime...
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    I am a mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend and in my spare time I help people buy and sell their homes :)

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